DMx6
by Lalalu
Summary: Lalalala, six songs by Depeche Mode, six short stories. First up: Somebody. Asucaga only.


Hi, sorry it's not any of the stories I've already started. But I've finished this so rather than just letting it collect dust in my computer (if that's possible) why not upload it? It might make someone glad.

This new project is something I thought about and worked with off and on for quite a while. And it's basically 6 short stories written with 6 different Depeche Mode songs as inspiration. Depeche Mode is one of my favourite bands and I think it's fantastic they have managed to stay so good for all these years. I easily get inspired by Martin Gore's (the person who writes most of the songs) music and lyrics. They often cover pretty dark subjects but he's also written some very beautiful love songs. 

First off is "Somebody" which is a beautiful song from the album "Some Great Reward", I'm not sure my story exactly captures the magic of this song. But I think it maybe shares some of that everyday angst… Honestly I've only used it as an original inspiration and after that the story has gone in the direction it wanted and I haven't bother to make it fit to the lyrics and I don't think that's necessary either. 

Since I can't include the lyrics here, I decided to it put on my homepage, there is also the official DM homepage which has lyrics to all DM songs, it's easy to find if you google. If you're curious that is, my guess is that most of you aren't. But if you haven't listened to them before and you like electronic pop music I can definitely recommend them. There are loads of material on You Tube as well, and you can get a laugh from the hilarious 80's haircuts and clothes at the same time. I've linked to a video of this song that somebody made in my profile page, I would have used the official video if it wasn't for the fact that Martin's hair makes it impossible for me to take it seriously. 

Anyway, I hope you will like this little story whether you like Depeche Mode or not. Always for asucaga-fans. 

* * *

**Somebody**

Again he was having these dreams. The ones that made you not want to fall asleep. He woke up in the middle of the night sweating and it was times such as this he wished he hadn't quit smoking. It was two years ago now, since he decided to lay off cigarettes. When he made that decision he threw out everything he had relating to tobacco. And he quit cold turkey, no chewing gums or plasters, he just quit. It was hard in the beginning, but after a week he started to get used to it, and he had not touched a cigarette since. But now two years after, in the middle of the night he was dying for a smoke. 

He knew he was going to regret it, throwing away two years, but he couldn't stop. He needed a change of scenery, he needed to get out of this room, out of this flat. It was wearing him out, it started to feel unbearably claustrophobic. He slowly got up and put on a pair of jeans and a T-shirt, went to the bathroom and took a wee, washed his hands and looked himself in the mirror. He looked tired with dark lines under his eyes, which wasn't strange when he was having those dreams.　It had been a while since he shaved, he never had much of a beard but the few hairs he had were getting pretty long. He drew his right hand through it and it made a rustling sound. It was going to be rather unpleasant to shave this, when the hairs had become this long they stuck in the razor, pulling out the skin. But he didn't bother to do that now. He shut the lights but managed to hit his toes in the doorpost when he was leaving, "Fuck!" he screamed and turned the lights on again. He hopped to the toilet and sat down on the lid and pulled off the sock from the foot he had smashed. Luckily it looked like the nail was saved, but it still hurt like hell. He cursed again, what a clot he was. Now he needed a smoke more than ever, and yeah, maybe a drink too.

He managed to get to the entrance hall safely this time, put on a pair of old sneakers and his jacket and went out. He lived on the third floor in a six floor building from the beginning of the last century. He had bought it from the money he got from his first book, it was in an attractive part of the city where prices were high and he liked it. He took the stairs, usually he took the elevator but tonight he felt like doing something different, even if the difference hardly could be called dramatic. There were two small stores which were open around the clock in his neighbourhood, he usually went to the one called "Minerva" because it was the closest to his flat but tonight he decided to go to "The Archangel". 

He said hello to the clerk and took a lighter and asked for the brand he preferred when he was a smoker. After he had paid he went out and immediately took off the plastic wrapper around the package, opened it and took out a cigarette. And while he put the lighter to it and inhaled to light it he thought about the book he was writing. He had been working on it for over a year now, and he was no way near finishing it. Sometimes he woke up in the middle of the night in panic because he was convinced everything he had written so far was absolutely crap. Sometimes he just wanted to delete the whole thing, but he was too cowardly to do something like that. But he hadn't made any backups, there was only one copy and it was on his laptop. This was not a recommended thing to do, but somewhere perhaps he hoped his computer would crash and he would be liberated from the weight of it.

"You got a fag?" He heard a voice and looked up and saw a blond girl in her early twenties probably -it was hard to tell.

"Sure," he said and handed her his newly bought package. She picked one and he lit it for her, she took a deep puff.

"Really, I'm trying to quit," she said and smiled apologetically, "But I'm not doing very well, as you can see."

"I've already quit, I quit two years ago. I haven't smoked since, until now," he said.

"You're kidding! Why, after two years?" she asked surprised.

Athrun shrugged, "I just really felt like it," and didn't explain any further, maybe because he thought it was incredibly stupid himself.

"I'm envious of you though," she said not bothering to inquire further, "The longest I've ever been able to quit is two days… I don't believe in nicotine gum, but maybe I should try it anyway since I've failed so miserably every time." You know try something new… she added.

"It gets easier after a week," Athrun said and suddenly didn't feel like smoking anymore, he dropped the fag and squeezed it under his sneaker.

"Really! Maybe if I had you as a coach or something it would be easier," she said. Of course it was meant as a joke, Athrun understood that but answered seriously anyway,

"I could be your coach. …Although I don't know if I'm someone to take after seeing how I bought this," he said shaking the little box, now with 18 cigarettes left in it. He smiled faintly and looked at her. She obviously thought he was joking too, and maybe he was, he didn't know why he said that.

"You would be my coach?" She asked slowly looking back at him.

"Yeah, and the first thing we have to do is to get rid of this." he threw the cigarettes in a litter bin,

"And this…" he said and took the cigarette from her mouth and threw it on the ground and stepped on it.

"Hey!" the girl protested. 

"Weren't you quitting?" he asked.

"Well, yeah…" the girl hesitated, she probably had intended to smoke at least that cigarette before she quit.

"You may as well start now then. I'm your coach remember, and you got to listen to what your coach says," he said and smiled teasingly.

"Oh yeah? So what does Coach suggest I should do now, I really wanted to smoke that fag," she said provocatively, and touched him for the first time. On the arm, he could feel her hand through his jacket.

"You need to find something to divert your attention," he said putting his arm around her waist and pulled her closer.

"You had anything special in mind?" she asked.

"I live nearby, you should come over."

"It's that an order Coach?" she said jokingly.

"No, but it is a recommendation."

"I see, well I guess I better come then," she said and he could feel how his blood started to rush. He couldn't believe what he was doing, but he was doing it. He took her hand and started to lead her the short way to his flat. He glanced furtively at her, and noticed she was wearing a black cotton jacket like he was. A tight T-shirt with some strange pattern on it, a short skirt and Converse sneakers, and it suited her pretty fine. She was very thin, to the point where he was almost afraid she would break if he held her tightly but she was pretty. While blonde hair by no means was an unusual colour the shade hers was in was pretty though it was hard to tell in the dusk.

They took the stairs, they hadn't said much since she had agreed to follow him and he thought it was best to avoid the uncomfortable silence that could appear if they were trapped in a lift together.

"Make yourself at home," Athrun said as he let her in. "You want a drink?"

"Sure, what do you have?" 

"Hmm, wine, whisky and probably vodka somewhere, I could fix something up with that."

"Whisky is fine," she said and started to look around the room.

"Whisky it is then. You can go on to the living room, I'll be there in second," he said trying to sound casual, hopefully it succeeded but his hands were shaking as he filled their glasses. He chose whisky for himself too and was grateful he didn't have to start fixing some more advanced drink right now. In any case, he needed a drink that was for sure. Contrary to what people might think, he hadn't done this often before, he normally hadn't the guts required. He'd had girlfriends, but not many and none of them had lasted very long. Honestly, he never had picked someone up like this. That's why it was hard for him to believe it himself. He drank from his glass in advance and poured new liquid into it.

When he came into the living room with their drinks, she sat on the couch looking a little tense which made him relieved: he wasn't the only one who was nervous.

"You keep it very neat here, none of my male friends keep things this tidy. Do you have people come over often?" she said as he placed the glasses on the coffee table.

He wondered what she meant by that, did she suspect he often brought girls home? Well even if it wasn't true it wasn't so strange if she thought so, and they didn't know each other at all. 

First he intended to seat himself beside her on the couch but changed his mind and chose the armchair instead. When he sat down he answered and hopefully she would understand, "No, not at all. Almost never. I don't know, I don't like to have things lying around I guess. I don't save things but throw them away instead, it's easier to clean that way probably." 

"Hmm, I like when it's tidy but I don't like to throw things away… It's really contradictory, I wish I could throw away things like you," she complained over her own inabilities.

They drank their drinks, Athrun, who never had excelled in conversation, couldn't come up with a new topic. And he didn't feel like he had anything more to add to the old one.

Maybe this was a bad idea after all, but he didn't want to back down now.

"You want another one?" Her glass had been emptied.

"No, I'm good," she answered and he felt it was an urge for him to do something. Now he regretted sitting in the armchair, it was so much harder doing anything from here. Then he remembered he hadn't heard her name yet, how could he forget to ask something so important?

"By the way, I'm Athrun." He thought it would be best to start with his own name.

"I'm Cagalli."

"Cagalli? That's a nice name," he said honestly.

"Thanks. I thought you were going to help me quit smoking Athrun. And just so you know I'm really dying for a fag right now."

Everything felt a little easier, a little lighter inside, just by hearing her say his name, which at the same time was a weird feeling. It was silly you know, to get excited over simple thing like that.

He took courage and said, "Now that you mention it I almost forgot." He rose from his chair, she gave him her hand, he helped her up. They kissed. They kissed some more and he let his hands move along her back. It was a good kiss. It tasted a little bitter from cigarettes and whisky, it didn't matter, they were tastes he liked. 

He took her hand and he led her to the bedroom. There they kissed again. The unknown scent of a person he never met before filled his nostrils. She wasn't wearing perfume and she smelled from cigarette smoke but somehow he really liked the way she smelled. And he smelled deeply, as if to remember that smell. He noted she was at least a little shorter than him. Not much, perhaps ten centimetres. He wasn't very tall, but still enough to be taller than most women. Not that it mattered that much, but he liked her height. Maybe she was a little too skinny, but that was just a detail. The most important thing right now was frankly that she was turning him on. She wasn't just passively waiting for him to do everything like his last girlfriend. It was a wonder that they could satisfy each other so deeply when they were two people who just met. They didn't know anything about each other but instinctively the communication worked. He really felt it had been fantastic and afterwards he slept a deep dreamless sleep, nothing came that would upset him and wake him up.

When he finally woke up the day after the other side of the bed was empty.

It was a double bed, his ex had made him buy when they still were together. She was practically living here then, and she complained it was hard sleep in his then single bed. And they went to IKEA together just like every other couple and bought the bed he was lying on right now. But the girlfriend was long gone and he had never felt that something was missing after her side of the bed was empty, until now.

"Cagalli?" he asked but there was no answer. The only evidence she had ever been there was the faint smell lingering in the sheets. And later the two glasses, still left on the coffee table. He looked but there was no note or anything. She was gone and the only thing he knew about her was her name, and come to think about it there was no guarantee that was her real name.

He felt a little depressed. It was the only good thing that had happened lately, and now it felt like a mistake. Maybe it was a mistake to sleep with her like that, it might have given her the wrong impression about him but he got the impression that was what she wanted too. Then it occurred to him that maybe that was all she was after. He wasn't sure what he wanted either but still he would have liked it to end in another way than this.

A little later he sat and stared into the kitchen wall with his coffee. He didn't even feel like smoking anymore, because it reminded him of last night. And that made him want to hug his head from embarrassment. He more and more started to think about the whole thing as a terrible mistake. Why did he do that? And those corny lines… "…I will never do that shit again…" he swore to himself. It made him feel miserable, it wasn't like he wanted to start smoking again but he wanted something to distract him and coffee wasn't enough. And, ironically, now the thing he had used to distract himself was the thing that reminded him the most. 

Cigarettes probably had been the thing he had used to keep the angst away. Whether it was because of some instinct of self-preservation he had kept himself from using alcohol that way. Or maybe it was because he liked it too much he didn't want to become an alcoholic so he wouldn't be able to drink anymore. But two years ago, he threw away cigarettes along with his girlfriend because he wanted change in his life. Already then his writing had become dull and unoriginal, and his book had received reserved reviews at best. And he was desperate for a change. But it was after that, he started to have the worst nightmares you could think of. Not every night but now and then they came, and just the thought that they might come kept him from falling asleep at night.

"So that was it…" he mumbled taking a sip from his second cup of coffee. He looked out the kitchen window, the weather was nice, clear blue sky and all. He looked down on the street where people were hurrying on their way to work. It reminded him, the girl, Cagalli, had been out considerably late for a workday. Maybe she still was a student. Maybe he should get a cat… He never was allowed to have a cat when he was little, despite begging off and on for several years. He had begged for a dog too, but a cat seemed easier to handle. A cat would liven up the place he thought, but he knew that he probably never would get one anyway.

I

Two weeks after the one-night-stand and he began to despair. He was ready to throw away his novel, and he didn't even bother to start the computer in the morning. Usually he forced himself to work at regular hours although lately that meant staring in to the screen reading things he had already written over and over making changes here and there and finally it had lost every resemblance to the original idea. He began to seriously suspect he was clinically depressed. Come to think of it, how long was it since he met his friends? He always said no when somebody called and asked if he wanted to go out, because, he had to work with his book, so they had stopped calling. He almost never left his flat, he just sat there with his computer as his only company. And it wasn't even like he belonged to a community or something. It was just he and his novel, and occasional worried e-mails from his publisher. At times like these being a bit on the pedantic side maybe, perhaps, was a blessing. If not his flat would probably looked like a bomb shell now. With unwashed dishes from a month back, smelly garbage, dirty laundry, mouldy food, empty bottles all over the place and he himself wouldn't have taken a shower for weeks. But it didn't matter how depressed or tired he got, he always showered everyday and he always cleaned everyday. 

But none the less he sensed he couldn't go on like this, he needed change. It was just that the last time he did something different it didn't end very well. But on the other hand he had read somewhere that it was good to do something different when you were stuck or depressed. So he decided to leave his novel for a while and he started to take walks instead. He felt liberated, not having to think about it all the time. He knew he couldn't put it off forever but for now, it was necessary. Coincidently he also noticed in pathetically bad shape, it seemed like sitting in front of the computer hadn't made wonders with his body. When he weighed himself for the first time in a year he noticed he had lost four or five kilos and he would swear those kilos were muscles. Looking in the mirror he could see the contour of his ribs and his hips and shoulders pointed out. He realised he was in no position to call anyone else scrawny. Ok, he liked being thin and he never was the buff type, but he didn't want to look like he just had been freed from a concentration camp. 

He had a long list of things he had to do which he had postponed using his book as an excuse. Sure, you could say he had postponed his whole life but with that perspective it was hard to know where to start. So he started with the little but nonetheless important stuff. For example he had to visit the bank, he had put it off for ages but now was as good a time as any. So he reluctantly walked the actually very short distance to the bank, but of course even if the physical distance was short the psychological distance made it almost impossible. It wasn't just that he thought things like this were incredibly boring it also was something which caused immense anxiety and up till now he had dealt with this by pretending the problem didn't exist. 

If he felt miserable as he walked into the bank it was soon exchanged by the feeling of astonishment. It was an incredible coincident, it really was. He could hardly believe his eyes when he found himself sitting facing the blonde girl he had sex with one night and never saw again. And he realised he was kind of happy to see her, which perhaps was a sort of miracle in itself. Who would have thought she worked in a bank? From her appearance he had thought she was a student or perhaps working with something cultural. It just goes to show, you can't judge a person by their looks he guessed. 

Yeah at first it was hard to believe it was really her, because she looked so different from how she looked when they met the first time. Now, she was neatly dressed probably according to the dress code the bank had with jacket, skirt and blouse. And, he imagined –he couldn't see, she was wearing pumps instead of Converse, of course she did. He looked at her curiously, for a while, though she looked bothered of which he didn't care. And he decided he liked the first version better. 

He smiled at her knowingly and asked, "How's the quit smoking going?"

"…actually it's going fairly well, you're an excellent coach," she answered somewhat uncomfortably as if it was a subject she would rather not touch.

"That's good to hear. Actually I haven't been able to smoke either," he said still smiling, "I have to say though, I was surprised when you'd left without a trace the morning after," he added and continued, "Especially without even saying good bye." He didn't know if that sounded bitter, maybe it did, but he wasn't. But there was no denying he was kind of glad to see her again.

Cagalli looked surprised, she hesitated and said, "Look, I rather not talk about this now. If you're not here to get help with your investments I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

"Alright, when do you quit?"

"…About five-thirty, why?"

"I'll treat you dinner, I'll wait outside here five-thirty."

"Ok… we can have dinner, but I'll pay for myself," Cagalli agreed, and he felt a little uplifted. Because she was interesting and he wouldn't mind getting to know more about her. For a moment both were quiet until Cagalli said a little irritably, "I said I'd meet you later so would you please leave, I'm trying to work here."

"But the reason I'm here is to get counselling. …What, did you think I came here pretending just to be able to talk to you?"

"No, of course I didn't thi-"

"I'm a costumer of this bank so you'll have to treat me nicely," he smiled smugly. 

Though looking awkward Cagalli helped and was very professional while Athrun mused, watching her in a totally different situation than before.

To pass the time while she was working he went to a book store, picked out an interesting-looking book and sat down at a café near the bank. He could actually see it from where he was sitting. A thought passed through his mind that maybe he was acting like a stalker, and he chuckled at himself. But he couldn't deny that he wanted to see her again, he still remembered how their night together had felt and he knew he wanted to share the same bed again. Undetectedly she had influenced him more than he thought.

At five-thirty they met outside the bank as promised and together they went to a nearby restaurant. And as he had suspected she had thought him to be a player. Because, why should someone like him be interested in her? Was the impression she apparently was under. Wasn't that incredibly insulting, he wondered. He couldn't say he was pleased at being looked as being "easy", especially since it wasn't true. But, well, it wasn't like he could blame her, they had never met before and they went to bed together without caring what the other person felt about them. There had been no promises, the only thing he knew was her name, which turned out to be her real name. So at least she didn't lie about that. There had been no promises, but she on the other hand hadn't given him the chance to make any either.

"Truthfully I panicked when I woke up in an unfamiliar bed, despite what you might think of me it's not something I usually do. Not that I think that it's anything wrong with it though," she explained. Maybe that was a little flattering, if what she said was true.

He found out it actually was easy to talk to her which probably was because of her not him. She seemed much more relaxed and she talked to him about a lot of things, and asked him questions which he just had to answer. When he didn't have to lead the conversation it was much easier. 

"So you've found out what I work with, it's only fair you should tell me what you do for a living," she asked.

"Haha, yeah I was really surprised when I saw you. You almost looked like a different person."

"I'm not wearing it because I like it," she grimaced showing she wasn't overly happy about it, "But aren't you avoiding the question, is it something so embarrassing you can't even tell me?"

"Hmm, actually …I _am_ kind of embarrassed to say it but I'm an author…"

"What, you're an author! …but I haven't heard of you? What have you written?" she asked eagerly.

"Well, that's because I write under a pseudonym…." he hesitated.

"Eeeeh? Why do you do that?" she looked surprised.

"I guess I don't like attention very much. I like writing though, or perhaps I used to like it,"

"So what is the pseudonym?"

"That's a secret," he smiled calmly at her.

"Why? Come on you can tell me!" she looked disappointed but eager at the same time.

"Maybe later" …when I know you better. He said realising he was hoping he actually would. 

From the time after Athrun had asked for the check the mood became strangely tense. It was as if both of them were unsure of what to. Now there was a problem, should they continue this and get to know each other better? She knew where he lived but he didn't know where she lived. Neither of them had each other's phone number. And let's say they agreed to meet again, should they say good bye now or should they do something else? Athrun hesitated, he didn't want to seem too eager or too pushy, he had already made her have dinner with him. He finally decided he would just ask for her phone number and go home after that. It was enough he got to see her again today and the possibility there might be more occasions helped him restrain himself. 

But when they had left the restaurant, Cagalli suddenly asked if he would want to come up for a while to her flat. Surprised but glad he accepted and followed her, it wasn't very long and not terribly far from his place. To the extent that it was strange they hadn't bumped into each other. But then again he didn't leave his apartment very often, or at least didn't use to. But it somehow felt natural the events took this course because there was no doubt the attraction was there, he was extremely conscious of every time they happened to touch and he could sense she was too. Maybe, maybe this was the beginning of an infatuation. If it was, it was stronger than any time he had experienced it before. Maybe he was falling in love, how strange. But just thinking of that possibility created butterflies in his stomach so he guessed it had to be so, making him even more nervous.

"Oh yeah, you're not allergic or anything are you? I have a cat… I forgot to tell you," she stopped the hand which was holding the key to the lock.

"No, I like cats."

"Good," she said and opened the door while muttering, "She's probably pissed right now," to herself.

"Huh?" Athrun asked confused.

"What? Oh, yeah the cat, she's probably angry because it's late and she hasn't been fed."

"Aha, I see. Sorry."

"Sorry? What are you apologising for?" she asked confused and then started to call for the cat, "Idun? Idun, where are you?"

"Make sure you close the door, sometimes she tries to get out."

"Oh," Athrun said lamely and quickly closed the door.

"She usually comes immediately…"

"I meant sorry, since it's my fault your cat is angry since I invited you to dinner."

"You were talking about that? Don't worry, she's probably just scared because she doesn't recognise you. Idun!" 

She tossed her shoes off and hurried through the hall into what seemed to be the kitchen. Athrun, a little confused, slowly took off his and placed them neatly in the shoe rack.

"Hi Idun, hi! Hi I'm home! Have you been lonely without me? I bet you have. And I bet you're hungry, aren't you. You're so cute, you look so cute I might eat you." He heard Cagalli greet her cat in the kitchen and the cat who answered with meows, it sounded funny. He chuckled a little. Since he never had had any pets it was a little hard for him to understand. He wondered if he would ever talk like that if he got a pet, probably not.

He followed Cagalli into the kitchen but immediately shrunk back because of the horrible smell that hit him. He was about to say, "What's this smell!" but stopped himself in the last moment. He didn't want to be rude or upset her in anyway.

"Oh, it's the cat food," Cagalli said apologetically as if she had read his mind.

"…I had no idea that it smelled this…" he hesitated if it was alright to say it.

"Bad?" she filled in for him

"Yeah, that was the word I was looking for, haha,"

"Yeah I know, I wonder what they put in those cans anyway… On second though I don't think I want to know. I'd hate it if I had to start making the cat food myself."

"I guess that would be a pain," Athrun agreed.

"It would," Cagalli assured him.

"So the one who's eating that stuff right now is my darling Idun," she introduced her to him.

"She's really cute," he commented. Idun was a silver and black coloured tabby, and, cute.

"You have excellent taste," Cagalli complimented him half-jokingly but he noticed there was a hint of seriousness too. People tended to take their pets seriously and he guessed Cagalli was no exception.

"Thanks," he said with a crooked smile that he didn't quite manage to suppress.

It didn't take long for Idun to finish her dinner and now she was looking at him intently. 

"Idun, this is Athrun. There's nothing to be afraid of," she talked to the cat as if it could understand her. Again it felt at little comical but he managed to keep a straight face.

"Let her smell your hand," she urged him and as he was told he crouched and reached out his hand. Idun, looked at it sceptically but soon sniffed at hesitantly. Her nose tickled a little but it wasn't unpleasant. Then suddenly she rubbed her head against his hand and he guessed that meant she had accepted him. He sighed from relief, somehow it felt that her approval was necessary if he wanted her mistress's approval. 

"It seems she like you," Cagalli said pleased.

"I hope so," he answered.

"She usually likes people so it's probably alright," she assured him and continued, "So Athrun, do you want anything to drink?"

"No, actually I think I'm good thanks."

"So…"

"So…"

The tension was broken by the meows of an affronted Idun.

"Don't mind her, she just wants attention," Cagalli said looking a little stressed and irritated.

"Eh, alright," he hesitated.

"Shower!" Cagalli suddenly exclaimed.

"Eh, what?" he didn't quite follow.

"I'm going to take a shower, I've been working all day so… You can play with Idun while I…"

"Wait!" he said a little bit too loud and grabbed her wrist. She looked him surprised and he suddenly felt embarrassed. 

"What I mean is… You don't have to do that now. Do it later," it came out more earnestly than he had intended. But he knew what he wanted to do, and if she showered he would want to do that too and he hadn't brought any spare clothes naturally. And he wasn't about to shower if he didn't have clean underwear to change to.

"Eh, eh ok. So what do you want to do?" she asked him. She seemed to be awkward too because she didn't meet his eyes.

"I want to kiss you?" he said trying to estimate her reaction. As usual he wasn't good in these situations.

"Sure?" she answered. She looked at him now. He took courage and gave her a light kiss. And if it wasn't before it now became completely clear to him that it wasn't going to be enough. The second kiss was considerably hungrier and they didn't stop while they moved to her bedroom. His shirt and her jacked landed on the floor somewhere along the way.

I

"I don't know what on earth made me believe you were a player," she said silently. She lay with her back against him and he let his free arm be around her waist.

"Oh, you're saying that _now_? When we just had… Well thank you very much," he answered sulkily. That was a severe blow to his confidence she delivered. What had been so good for him, the thought that it might not have been as good for her made him instantly depressed.

"Hahaha, I didn't mean it like that," she laughed amused and turned around her head and eyed him carefully.

"What I meant was that you're no way smooth enough. The sex was great, I promise," she said still chuckling a little.

He sighed from relief, although it was a little annoying he had allowed her to tease him like that. But he guessed it didn't really matter, the overwhelming sensation of bliss he felt right now won easily over all other emotions. His hand stuck as he tried to slide his fingers along the outline of her body, still warm and sticky from sweat. It was hot, not only they, or the room but the weather was hot. It was the end of June and for a week the temperature had become higher and higher and it's was getting unusually dry for this time of the year. But it didn't matter, he didn't mind that it was too hot to be so close to each other right now, he didn't mind the sweat. There was so much that was good about Cagalli, not only that she was sexy and cute. He liked her intelligence and her independence and the fact that she wasn't afraid to say her opinion. He really wished he could stay here all night, he really wished he didn't have to go home tonight but he knew he probably had to. He worried what she really thought about him but was afraid to ask, or rather he felt it was too soon to ask and too soon to say how he himself felt. Not that he was absolutely certain what those feelings actually where. But he worried anyway, he hoped at least she would want to see him again. It was a dark cloud in an otherwise beautiful clear blue sky. He smiled crookedly, he could recognise the pattern, this was so typically him. Even when he was the happiest he always found something to pull him down. 

He was awakened from his brooding by a crazy attack of scratches on the door which Cagalli had insisted on closing. He could see why.

"Oh, I was waiting for that to happen," Cagalli groaned, "She doesn't like closed doors," she explained.

"Hmm," he answered, in lack of anything better to say.

"Well, I guess I'd better open that door before she's clawed her way through it."

She quickly put on her underwear and opened the door and the cat came dashing in and jumped up on the bed while meowing all the time. He sighed but sat up and reached out his hand and patted the cat who started to purr immediately, probably she was excited because she had been let in. He couldn't deny he liked that sound, it was soothing in a strange way.

"Well I'm going to take that shower now," Cagalli said.

"Oh ok, I'd better get going then," he said and starting to pick up his clothes.

"You're going home?"

"Yeah."

"…Ok." She looked like she was hesitating.

"I have to get home, I don't have any things with me and I want to take a shower too so…" he hurried to explain.

"That's true," she answered.

He walked through the small hall while Cagalli waited in the doorway as she wasn't properly dressed.

"Well, thanks for tonight," he said after he had put on his shoes. 

"Wait, your phone number!" Cagalli said and he froze. How could he forget? Something that important?

"I haven't gotten your phone number yet," she explained.

"I totally forgot about that. I want your phone number as well," he managed to mumble. Well there was no use denying it, he was pathetic. But there was a comfort, she wanted his number, that had to be a positive thing. She might like him a little at least.

All in all this day had been beyond expectation. In fact it could qualify as one of the best nights in his life, he thought as he walked home in the warm summer night. He wondered if he should wait a couple of days to call her but he didn't think he could wait that long since he desperately wanted to call her right this instance. He had to use all his will power not to because he knew she would probably be in the shower right now and he would only bother her. For once he felt positive and he had a feeling things would turn for the better now. It was true, he needed something like this, he needed this, her. He wasn't going to let her go. Not without a fight at least. 

People must have thought he looked crazy because he couldn't stop grinning like crazy. Normally it was something he would be bothered by but not now. It felt like the only person who could bring him down from the little clouds he was dancing on right now was Cagalli, or maybe himself. 

"Shit, I think I'm in love," he mumbled to himself and with light steps he walked home while trying to calculate exactly when she would come out of the shower so he could call her.

* * *

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Triva: Idun is a goddess in Nordic mythology. Pronounced in Swedish I think it's a beautiful name, I'm not sure it fits a cat though…

Hmm a beta reader seems like a good idea... if there's anyone up for it. I already have someone who reads my stories before I put them up but since that person is Swedish too someone who's English speaking might be needed. My English is leaning towards British English? But I know I probably knowingly or unknowingly use some American English as well. I know you're not supposed to do that but well... I'm a little afraid of beta readers though, I have to admit. They seem scary for some reason. 


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